Are you ready for some football???

I sure as hell am. I don't know why it fires me up so much, but opening weekend of the NFL is as good for me as the Superbowl. Life outside of the NFL season is just so... gray. Time to strap it on and gear up for another campaign! Put your jersey on! Remember: if you're not dressed, the coach won't put you in! Let's take a look at the rundown for the first weekend of NFL action:

New York Jets at Washington Redskins
Whoo! What a way to kick it all off. Two teams with big questions coming into the season facing off on a Thursday night. I think both teams will see some problems on offense, but I expect Vinny to do OK; I'm still a loyalist to the old Buc. On defense, I just forsee the 'Skins making more plays. The real fun aspect of this game will be all the turnover of Jets players to the 'Skins; I think there will be some bad blood, and I expect some to be left on the field. Give the Redskins the edge on this one and the Jets a quiet ride home.
Arizona Cardinals at Detroit Lions
I'm not sure how well the Mooch will have his team prepped up for this game, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Hopefully, Arizona will be reborn now that they aren't trying to force themselves into a mold around Plummer. I'm going to give the Cards a win here, probably by 10.
Denver Broncos at Cincinnati Bengals
This may be a homer pick, but I think that the Bengals will be thrown around like the only Playboy in a frat house. They'll get some wins later in the season, but not this week.
Indianapolis Colts at Cleveland Browns
This will probably be one of the best matchups of opening weekend. Dungy will have that defense firming up, and the offense is already good; I think it would be better if they didn't call audibles on 80% of their plays, but it will probably (once again) get them to a first-round blowout in the playoffs. Get Manning to cut the audibles, and they could go much further. The Browns are too busy figuring out which QB to use (don't expect the Couch to get off the bench), and it distracts them from winning. Colts.
Minnesota Vikings at Green Bay Packers
I don't know why, but I'm getting a vibe from Moss and Culpepper that says they are getting back in sync with each other. I also think that the renovations to Lambeau might have chased away the good mojo. I'm going to take the Vikings in a squeaker.
San Diego Chargers at Kansas City Chiefs
The Chargers have a good running back, a good QB (a great backup QB!), and a diminished defense without Junior. Green will be efficient and lean on Holmes and Gonzales to get them through. This one belongs to the crowd at Arrowhead, who disrupts the Chargers enough to give the Chefs the win.
Atlanta Falcons at Dallas Cowboys
Even without Vick, this game belongs to the Falcons. Parcells is starting his first year as a coach in Dallas, and he usually uses that to weed out players who quit when things are tough. I don't expect the Cowboys to have a better record this year, but I wouldn't be surprised to see a third of the team flushed when the season is over. Hey, is Dave Meggett available??
New Orleans Saints at Seattle Seahawks
Brooks will do well this first half of the season, only to have the Aints do it again and blow the season in December. Seattle looks tough, and should be better now that Holmgren has been forced back into being a coach rather than the all-powerful being he thought he deserved to be. The Saints should have enough gas to win this one and start out the season right.
Baltimore Ravens at Pittsburgh Steelers
The wide receiving corps for the Steelers is going to put the Ravens defence to the test, but I really don't see the intimidation that the Ravens used to bring. Lewis is intense, but if you avoid going to the middle of the field it just looks calm; without team effort, the defense can't support the sub-par offense, and the Steelers steal a "W".
Houston Texans at Miami Dolphins
Blowout of the week. Ricky Williams goes happy-go-jackie like a donkey eating a waffle. Sweet sassy molassy! Carr will watch most of the game from his back or the bench, and the Dolphins will have cruise control on by the third quarter for a relatively easy win.
Jacksonville Jaguars at Carolina Panthers
You know, the longer the Jags have been around, the more bland they've become. All their stars (except Brunell) go to other teams, and none of their players become big fantasy attributes. The Carolina defense is better than average, so they'll outshine the rival team's O. That means it comes down to the Panther offense, which hasn't really impressed me. I'll give them the edge in what really is a plain vanilla contest. Remember the great start these two teams had? Playing the Hall of Fame Game their first year in the league? What happened to those teams??
New England Patriots at Buffalo Bills
Loaded with Bledsoe and the newly-acquired ex-Pat, Milloy, the Bills will prevail in this contest. Brady will do his part, but I just see problems for the Patriots defense when Lawyer is tipping off the offense about all the defensive plays. Go long, Drew. Go long.
St. Louis Rams at New York Giants
I don't know how well the Giant defense is set up this year, but I know Lovie Smith has the Ram defense ready to play. The play of Tiki will probably determine this match for the Giants, but the biggest factor will be Warner. He's looked good in preseason and in camp; is he ready for the game? I'm going to wager a fourth-quarter takeover by Bulger, but it won't be enough. Giants are 1-0 going into week 2.
Chicago Bears at San Francisco 49ers
This is going to be a long day for the Bears. Garcia may be having back problems, but has enough offensive weapons around him that he won't be at risk for long, if at all. Kordell will go into panic mode not because he'll be in a tight game, but because his line won't be able to give him more than 3 seconds this season.
Oakland Raiders at Tennessee Titans
The Raiders had a fantastic year last year, but I really felt the better matchup for the big game would have been the Bucs and Titans (my picks for this year's Superbowl). The Raiders D won't be able to hold back the Titans this time, and McNair will drag the team to the end zone if he has to. The Titans D is going to have a field day, and I wouldn't be surprised to see three sacks and three picks. Tennessee: start your winning streak now; we'll let you know when to stop.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Philadelphia Eagles
New stadium. Healthy stars. Home field. How can the Eagles lose? They're playing the best team in the NFL. My Bucs start the second drive to the Superbowl where the last trail left off. These two will probably see each other in the playoffs again this year, but it will be in Raymond James. The pirate ship sails as the always-ready D is complemented by an upgraded offense. Bucs take home a win.
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